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things on my desk

 

Maybe I should have gone to Father Guido Sarducci’s University. . .

lived and loved (and also had a GREAT week of . . .)

1. renewed friendship
2. laughter
3. wonderful conversations
4. remembering to revel in the small things
5. FRESH STRAWBERRIES
6. enjoying life, just where I am
7. out of town guests
8. playing in the country
9. chickens, goats, & gardens
10. dreaming of the future
11. . . .and realizing that the possibilities are open and endless
12. counting down the days until the court date (2 WEEKS!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!)
13. realizing that either way, on June 4th, all I have to do is keep breathing
14. realizing that there is an army of people supporting and praying for my son
15. learning to know that change doesn’t have to be scary or depressing
16. remembering that this is life, and that’s what it does. . .change.
17. knowing that I am loved, and am loved well
18. thankfulness and a peace of mind
19. knowing that I don’t deserve any of these things, but appreciating that for this week (*and for most of these things, a majority of my life), I got to experience them

crooked lines

Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage.  The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace.

-Matthew 6

 

The older I get, the more complicated life seems to become.  Someone recently told me that for me, some things are like crooked lines, and for other people, it’s not like that.  Paths are straight, no pot holes, no meandering.  Although this person suggested that maybe I could try to make things straight(er), I think I’ve decided that I like crooked lines.  The artist in me thinks they’re much more interesting.  

I’ve also learned that I’m not a fast walker.  I like to take in the scenery, soak it up, enjoy the sunshine, smell the flowers, and all that other frilly stuff that our tv-based culture seems to discount.  Ever since returning from India, I’ve been turning the volume down on my life-slowing things up a bit.  Not rushing onto the next project (and for those that know me well, they understand how big of a deal this is).  My sweet friend Mandy calls herself a slow perfectionist. Being around people like her and other dear friends, reiterate the realization that there is a lot of good living that takes place in the slow moments . . . and a lot of joy that comes in the discovery of learning. . .I mean REALLY learning, something new.  

A good deal of my time in the last 4+ years have been spent learning as much as I can, as fast as I can. Masters, check. MBA, check. PhD, almost check. As I’m nearing the end of this journey, things are coming slower.  Don’t get me wrong, LIFE isn’t coming any slower, but my perception of my life is.  I don’t know where I’m going from here.  Actually I don’t even know if I’m going anywhere.  I could stay here for a while just as easily as I could go somewhere (*anywhere) else.  It’s almost as if a giant pause button has been pressed on my life goals, or at least on what I thought my life goals were.  Things that were very important to me six months ago, don’t seem quite as urgent anymore.  Priorities have shifted.  Community and intentionality are coming into focus.

Two things that are certainties.  One, I find life by living it with others.  Family, new friends, old friends, soon-to-be friends, housemates, guests, and hopefully soon, a son.  And two, I enjoy planting things and watching the miracle of life do its mighty work.  The city girl in me is slowly discovering that maybe rural life is what I’m made for.  Those slow and easy early mornings, where drinking coffee and sitting watching the world wake up is a priority.  We’ll see where this new found slowness takes this whirl-wind of a life of mine.  I’ll try to keep you posted.

dissertation hibernation

see you guys when I’m finished. . .until then, good day & good bye

Ladies and Gentlemen. . .

WE HAVE A COURT DATE!!!

JUNE 4, 2009

haiku for a lovely tuesday evening

yesterday i dreamt

of laughter, love, joy and more

sweet gabe, come home soon!

get him home soon & safe

my current prayer for the little one. . .

the most PRECIOUS sentence of my life up to this point

A few days ago I got an update on my sweet baby boy and this one sentence has made me cry tears of joy on and off ever since:

“His language is laughing. . .”

I can’t wait to actually hear his language of laughter, to touch his precious belly, and see his big brown eyes.  People weren’t kidding when they said this is the hardest part of the whole adoption process.  WAITING and WAITING.  Most days I try to keep my sanity by staying insanely busy (oxymoron, I know).   We’ll see how long I can keep this up. . .

there is no me without you

I just learned of the passing of Haregewoin Teferra. Please read the letter from
Melissa Fay Greene below to catch a glimpse of this wonderful human being.

2009-03-19

Haregewoin Teferra 1946 (est.) - 2009
Dear Friends,

By now you may have learned the shocking news that Mrs. Haregewoin Teferra has died
suddenly after a short illness. We don't know what caused her death; she felt sick
for a couple of days, went to the doctor, came home without a diagnosis, felt sick
again, laid down, and that was the end. Soon I will post a blog containing beautiful,
loving, compassionate messages pouring in in tribute. Many of you kindly are asking
what you could do in her memory. Let me tell you what I will do, and each of you
can follow your hearts. A few weeks ago, Worldwide Orphans--the New York-based
organization that has provided pediatric care to Haregewoin's children for many
years--assumed responsibility and custody of her 42 HIV-positive kids. To cover
food, healthcare and medicine, education, clothing, and caregivers will cost an
estimated $4600/year per child.  I plan to do what I can to support these children;
they are precious, bright, full of fun and hope. With continued state-of-the-art
medical care and excellent nutrition and nurturing, they can have bright futures.
They can grow up healthy, go to college, have careers. If you'd like to join me in
that campaign, online contributions can be made at
https://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/2669/shop/custom.jsp?donate_page_KEY=2749

Checks may be sent to:
WWO
511 Valley Street
Maplewood, New Jersey 07040

Other HIV-negative children, many of them babies and toddlers, remain at Atetegeb,
Haregewoin's foster home; their caregivers have stayed on; and the Atetegeb board
is looking to their well-being. As soon as I know how help can be offered to these
little ones, I will post that here.
At Little Atetegeb, for positive children
Haregewoin lived with these children seven days a week, 24 hours a day, for ten years. She is irreplaceable. The youngest children, of course, have no idea what has just happened. Please let us work together to act as foster parents in absentia for them and to provide financial sustenance to the adults on the ground in Addis during this transitional time. Thank you in advance for any amount you can give. Sincerely, Melissa
(Author of There is no me without you)